The sweatshirt, not the guy. And it's for me, not Christopher. I sized down, so hopefully it will fit. I'm hoping for a slouchy-slim look, anyway. I could easily spend my entire next paycheck at Everlane.
I worry about a lot of things. It's easy for me to believe that everything happens the way it's supposed to for other people, but when it comes to my own life I'm plagued by all the little what-ifs. Did I make the right choice taking time off after grad school? The free time I thought I'd have without classes has turned into a string of endless, numbered days. Work leaves me too exhausted and drained to make much of my evening hours, especially after cooking dinner, cleaning, and preparing for the next day. It's somehow duller, lonelier, and more leeching than the schoolwork that sent me looking for a break in the first place. Should I have studied music in grad school or even gone to grad school straight out of college at all? As hard as I worked for the degree, it does little for me other than acting as a stepping stone if I ever go back for a doctorate. Maybe another major or an internship or an entry-level job would have been a better post-college choice? It...
I always approach giveaways and sweepstakes with a grain of salt because so many people enter. But I also figure that, statistically, if I just keep plugging away, eventually something will come of these entries. And earlier this week it did: I won The Clothes Horse 's a-thread giveaway! So now I have $75 to spend in their online shop, and I have no idea what to get. Below are some of my favorites: Fierce Floral Shift Dress , Scallop Print Dress , Lace Swing Dress , Big Floral Surplice Dress , Brooklyn Chambray Blazer , Splat Dot Racerback Blouse , Woven Peplum Top in Maroon/Orange , Silk Stripes and Flowers Blouse I can't decide if I should opt for the less expensive items so I can get more than one, or if I should go ahead and blow it all on one piece. At the end of a hard week, this is one tough decision that's nice to make.
Most of the time, most people are not crying in public, but everyone is always in need of something that another person can give, be it undivided attention, a kind word or deep empathy. There is no better use of a life than to be attentive to such needs. There are as many ways to do this as there are kinds of loneliness, but all of them require attentiveness, all of them require the hard work of emotional computation and corporeal compassion. All of them require the human processing of the only animal who risks “getting it wrong” and whose dreams provide shelters and vaccines and words to crying strangers. We live in a world made up more of story than stuff. We are creatures of memory more than reminders, of love more than likes. Being attentive to the needs of others might not be the point of life, but it is the work of life. It can be messy, and painful, and almost impossibly difficult. But it is not something we give. It is what we get in exchange for having to die. -- ...
Comments
Post a Comment